Think again: that first thought blindspot

These opinions are unbidden and endless. Uncontrollable, really. But that’s okay because there’s something even better waiting in the wings. The power of our second thought. That’s what matters. What we think next.

Let’s face it, often our first thought is negative. Probably tracks back to our origins where we were constantly having to think what life-threatening danger awaits, like an attacking tiger. Or a Smilodon, a saber-tooth cat. You see, my first thought was tiger — but then my second thought was, “Were there even tigers in prehistoric times?” So I Googled it and learned about Smilodons. Isn’t that the entire point? Question your first thought. Consider your second thought as Googling your own self as an investigation into what you actually believe. And, even better, being willing at times to reach for bigger understandings or deeper truths.

If the first thought is primal and reflexive, the second thought is chosen and created. That’s where mind-blowing potential exists. A second thought can bring accuracy, understanding, growth, kindness, and at the very least, self-awareness. All in one remarkable second thought. After all, getting to what we genuinely think is much better than letting a first thought lie.

I notice many of my first thoughts are judgments born of worry, fear and anxiety. I realize that’s human. But if I want to be a human being, second thoughts are the ticket. Listening to them often guides me to a more caring way to see something, including myself.

In these days of (hopefully) rising consciousness of injustice and hate in all forms, the ability to have second thoughts is a skill worthy of encouragement. Ultimately, we are all conditioned to think about things the way we’ve always thought about them. For example, if someone was never taught about implicit bias and privilege, their first thoughts would not only be antiquated, but unfortunately hurtful to their community and detrimental to their own growth.

For me, being willing to question my first thoughts has been life changing. I remember, in my ignorance, thinking, don’t all lives matter? Or using phrases that I didn’t know were hurtful to various groups of people for their historical and cultural context. I am profoundly grateful for the many second thoughts I’ve had about all of these. Being able to see beyond a first thought has been one of the most expansive, empathetic, and constructive practices of my life. There is always something new and vitally important to learn. About ourselves. And each other.

Inevitably, this brings us to what’s next: third thoughts. Author Terry Prachett describes them as ones “that watch the world and think all by themselves.”

My first thought to that quote was, “Huh?” Thank goodness for my second thought: perhaps Prachett is speaking to the possibility of melding life’s contradictions into heightened knowingness and humanity. A grand second thought, isn’t it? And my third thought? Wouldn’t that be nice.

Carole Vasta Folley’s In Musing column has won awards from the Vermont Press Association, The New England Newspaper & Press Association and the National Society of Newspaper Columnists.